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What does Independence mean to you ?

Updated: Mar 25

My personal reflections on Independence and Journal Prompts for you

This is what I Journaled about this morning. I found myself on july,4th without plans, without a partner and without my kids. This might be the first time i've been fully independent on this holiday. It use to be my anniversary. Since i was 19 years old I would ironically celebrate my union with someone else on what was known as independence day.


Once that relationship shifted into a coparenting dynamic in 2016. I was 29 and found myself changing out of an decade old pattern. For a few years the focus shifted onto my kids , what brought them joy and how we could celebrate that day in a way that served them. I never really found something that fit or that I enjoyed and settled for enjoying the fact that my kids enjoyed it.



Another shift happened when I got Sober 3.5 years ago. No more drinking all day for occasions like this simply offered a shift and new experience , of myself, of the company I shared it with and the way I "celebrated" holidays. I fully respect others on how they choose to celebrate today and any other day for that matter. The sober clear mind and lack of direction, pressure and responsibility today allowed me to reflect on what independence means to me. So first I defined a few words, which is my usual process to understand what i'm reflecting on ;


Independence ;

  1. Not needing others opinions or approval

  2. Not subject to control by others

  3. Showing a desire for freedom or autonomy

  4. Not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence

  5. Capable of thinking or acting for oneself. Not influenced by others

  6. Not depending on something else for strength or effectiveness; freestanding

Ok so then I thought about using this day as a metaphor ....

we celebrate our nation/ countries independence today , What if i see myself as my own

"country" ( defines country)



Country ;


1. A nation with its own government occupying a particular territory


... ok , easy , my physical body is the territory.....Defines Government


Government;


  1. The exercise of political authority over the actions, affairs, etc, of a political unit, people, etc, as well as the performance of certain functions for this unit or body

I really like the idea of being my own political authority for my actions and affairs.For my body , for my children and myself ....



So after i define these words it becomes clear



Reflect on what it means to me to be independent

How have i fought to gain and maintain my independence ?

Have I gone to war with myself and others for it ?

Similar to what I see with our country , Has my ambition to assert independence become harmful to gaining useful allies ?

Understanding if I want to go fast, go alone but if i want to go far, go together.

At what cost , what will I sacrifice for this independence?

Am i assuming authority for my body , myself and my children or allowing other to decide for us?



The Declaration of Independence states three basic ideas: (1) God made all men equal and gave them the rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness; (2) the main business of government is to protect these rights; (3) if a government tries to withhold these rights, the people are free to revolt and to set up a new government.

How am I self governing?

Am I trusting in god/ a higher power that all men are equal and have the rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness ?

Am i denying these things for myself ?

How can I create or allow these in my life and for others ?

Am I protecting this and will I set boundaries and uphold them or respect when others do?

Is it time to set up a new government?



Remember these are all self reflective questions, not about the president or the USA but about you. Without judgement but to seek truth .

Truth only exists in the absence of judgment

The world around us offers so much insight so much metaphor and self reflection for spiritual growth.


I was tuning this all out and for me I had a different calling. During this lifetime I was meant to tune in. To understand and see a greater underlying rhythm and share that perspective and experience with others.


I hope you find time to reflect on what this all means to you .



Coaching sessions are always available if you would like a guide on the side to walk you through and offer perspective and support.








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